This morning I had brunch with my friend Charlotte, who turns 90 on April 10 this year. I met her at her house; she has long since turned in her drivers’ license and sold her car. “I turn the big 9-0 next month. Can you believe it??” she said, voice rising in excitement with a big smile. She’s is truly proud and excited about it.
Over a diner breakfast, we talked about the places she’s lived and the many friends she’s accumulated and lost. At 90, her husband and most of her friends have passed, and she’s basically homebound, relying on friends and a housekeeper for grocery shopping and errand-running. With bad eyesight, reading books is out of the question, so she watches a lot of TV. She says “Oh well, it won’t hurt me.” We talked about her favorite foods from Turkey, where she lived for 3 years. I told her I am 29, and she said she remembered being 29, working in Japan. At one point, after sharing the long list of friends coming to visit over the next month, I said, “You have many more friends than I do!” – to which she replied, laughing – “Well, I’ve had 90 years to make them!”
Driving home, I considered a plan to live for 90 years. Fortunately, I come from a long line of healthy great-grandmothers and grandmothers who have thrived well into eight decades, full of spunk and vivacity. So I have genetics in my favor. I believe in healthy eating and exercise, but I also believe in a full heart as an essential element of health. Being passionate about… well, something, taking risks and approaching adventure with gusto, laughing hard and often, smiling and giving freely to others, keeping unhealthy stress to a minimum. This is how I hope to live to 90.
As I neared home, I considered the length of 90 years, a very full lifetime. The idea of filling my head and my soul with 90 years worth of experiences and memories is overwhelming, but I hope I am lucky enough to do it. Charlotte’s head must be bursting with memories of friends, and travel, and good food, and thoughtfulness. She’s a person that has always lived by a generous code of hospitality, making the creation of comfort and enjoyment for others a priority in her life.
90 is a lot of years, but only if we make them count.
